Screw The Patriarchy!
I don’t know how to start this blog. Maybe with- “She was just walking home!”
If you don’t know what I’m talking about, earlier this month, Sarah Everard disappeared while walking home to Brixton after visiting a friend.
A day later, on March 4, Sarah’s boyfriend contacted the police to report that she was missing. The police then sought public help in tracing her whereabouts, and posted tweets to elicit response from Londoners. This case caught the attention of a lot of Londoners who tried to bring this incident under as much light as they could.
On Wednesday (March 10), the police discovered bodily remains in a wooded area of Ashford town in Kent, and on Friday (March 12) confirmed, through the use of dental records, that the body belonged to Sarah.
Sarah Everard was molested and murdered.
Rest In Peace Sarah.
This case just brought pure outrage in thousands of people. All she was doing was trying to walk home. What did she do wrong? She did everything according to the guidelines of how society wants a woman to behave at night. She wore full clothes, she didn’t wear “provoking” clothes. She didn’t instigate any actions. She called her partner. What went wrong!
This isn’t the first time an incident like this has happened- The Nirbhaya case, Junko Furuta case, Oksana Makar case, to name a few.
You know what the first thing the victims are asked, “What were you wearing?” Not even “Are you okay?” Why do the clothes the person is wearing pose as a threat. Will my clothes be a menace to me. Why are the women told to “cover up”. Why can’t the people with the horrible mindset that they can do whatever they want to do to any female walking at night. told that it is not okay to think that way? Why can’t those creeps be told just how pathetic they are? Why can’t they be told to mind their own business? Clothes aren’t invitations! I could wear a mini skirt and still not be asking for it. The victim shaming, the victim blaming- Why? Why should a woman feel unsafe after the sun sets down? Why is it that every time I’m walking alone at night, I won’t wear my earphones- because every sound makes me cringe and reminds me of the thousands of women who have been assaulted at night. Clutching a key between our fingers as a weapon, it’s almost an instinct now. Why should a woman have to buy pepper sprays or tasers or flashlights? Why can’t we just walk home without having this constant fear in the back of our minds that we might get molested?
I think all of these ideas are stemmed in the brains of these creeps in schools. My school has uniforms, but sometimes we’re allowed to wear casual clothes. Every announcement goes like “You can wear casual clothes on XY day. Wear proper clothes. Girls, no tank tops, shorts or revealing clothes are to be worn. Don’t wear ‘torn’ jeans.” This is the root of the problem. It frustrates me so much. Why shall I have to cover up, why can’t the boys be told to control their actions. My clothes are not labels! If the dress reveals my shoulders or stomach, then let it. It’s called fashion. What gives anybody the right to tell me what clothes are “inappropriate”? I should be able to wear anything I want, without being stared at or catcalled. The ‘dress code’ is very problematic. It is rules like these which give the boys the chance to grow with the mindset that if a woman wears revealing clothes, she’s provoking a man. “It’s for your own safety.” But no! These ideologies just give out the wrong message! And my clothes do not define my character! “Oh, she wears those mini shorts, must be ‘easy’, Ugh, she wears those ugly long skirts, must be the stays-at-home-24/7-nerd” The clothes a woman wears do not define how she behaves! It is outrageous to see interviews of random people saying that the victim shouldn’t have provoked the man.
“Don’t wear that shirt, you know you have big breasts.”
“We can see her bosom, she’s disgusting”
I’m sorry, but did anyone ask for that opinion? It’s not like she can change her body and she shouldn’t have to. If a woman’s bosom is big, it isn’t anybody’s concern. Maybe the shirt makes her feel comfortable and good in her skin, but these people just won’t see it because they are so busy being judgemental creeps.
And yes, I might be told that I’m too young to write this. But, these assaults happen to girls my age. They happen to infants! You are never too young to voice your opinions. Don’t let anybody steal you voice.
This is in no way a hate blog to the boys out there. In fact, this is just what I, as a woman feel. And I love my fellow feminists out there, no matter what your gender is. But, if you are offended by this blog, I think there is something you have been doing wrong.
It blows my mind that after all of this, there is still nothing said to the boys.
Patriarchy is just a jail for females, a constant reminder that we will always be inferior to the male gender. We try to speak, but the rage and the frustration just lets out a disgruntled scream. We try to scream at the world, tell them that we are not less, but maybe they’re just deaf, we’re inaudible to them. This constant rage and fear keeps makes our blood boil, but at the the end of the day, while walking home at night, we remove our earphones, clutch our keys, and stay alert. At the end of the day, the patriarchy tells us that all these movements are a lost cause. But we must not listen to it, because we aren’t just made for the male gaze or for society to keep in a chokehold. We are woman. We are strong. We will not be told what to do or wear. We will make decisions for ourselves.
And on that note-
Dear Patriarchy, SCREW YOURSELF!
With all sincerity,
Girlonline.
